Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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