I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
