Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
