I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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