We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
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