If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
it glows. i had to have it.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
