I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
