im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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