I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
It's never too late to be topless.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
