maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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