This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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