U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
