brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
