it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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