yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
