is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
