She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize