either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
