it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize