just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
