I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Randomize
