Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
