The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
