Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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