I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
