Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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