Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Randomize
