Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
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