Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Randomize