Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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