It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
