He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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