Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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