I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Is it penis luge time yet?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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