yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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