Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
