yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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