I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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