As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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