Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize