Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
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