We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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