Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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