So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize