There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
