whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize
