I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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