the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize