I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize