I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
